![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 3 of 3. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by wishingstar on March 2, 2008, at 18:49:54
What to do when therapy is only good for venting and not much more? Does anyone ever feel this way? I can bring up the most "real" or most important issues, talk about them, but once I'm done getting out the story and how I feel about it, or the issue that was triggered (whatever it might be), there's just nothing else to say. And it's on to the next topic. I dont want to take away from the value of having someone to vent to.. it IS helpful.. but I'm not getting any better. I feel like I'm dealing with the day to day crises, not the real issues. If that makes sense. I'm not seriously depressed these days, so crisis management doesnt need to be a priority like it has been in the past.
I dont know what to do with this. I've been with my current T for almost a year and a half now. I cant say I totally trust her not to disappear, but not because of anything shes done. However, I DO feel like I'm being totally honest when i tell her what's going on. I'm not hiding anything. But she isnt the first therapist I've felt this way with either.. that all I'm doing is venting.
I guess there's a difference between supportive therapy and actual change-oriented therapy? I appreciate the support, but I need help making change. I'm willing to do the work, but I dont know how to fix it.
I've approached this issue with her in the past (and with other therapists). I'm planning to do it again soon. But it's very scary, as I had a bad experience with an unethical therapist before my current one. Long story, but it very much hurt my ability to trust and ask for what i need.
I did have one therapist who i didnt feel this way with. We connected and I could feel real growth happening. It was great. But she's 2 hours away and with my job, it's not possible for me to see her. My point is just that I know what I'm looking for exists. I think it's what I hear a lot of you write about regularly.
Posted by caraher on March 2, 2008, at 19:09:48
In reply to venting versus change, posted by wishingstar on March 2, 2008, at 18:49:54
I hope you find a way to make her understand what you need. You need either to try again or find a therapist you can trust who will work in a way that really brings about lasting positive change. Given how scary it can be to find someone new another round of giving your T a chance to rise to the occasion seems in order. Good luck!
Posted by twinleaf on March 2, 2008, at 20:12:30
In reply to Re: venting versus change, posted by caraher on March 2, 2008, at 19:09:48
You described very clearly the most important thing about therapy- that the relationship, in all of its mystery, is what allows growth and change to occur. You are saying that your previous therapeutic relationship allowed for real growth, while your present one really doesn't. You know this. I guess the question to ask is, do you have important areas where you would like to grow and change? Do you see yourself doing that with your present therapist? If not.....
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Psychology | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.