![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Happyflower3 on September 24, 2007, at 11:39:36
Just call me a cry baby! Dang! We were talking about the recent good stuff that I am intimidated about. Then somehow we got to talking about my old T and EMDR. Then I realized I missed him and my eyes started to fill with tears. This didn't get past my new T.
We did EMDR on my feelings I have for old T. I thought I was okay with things with him, but I guess I still have some feelings. I talked about how I felt about my T , and how I only felt that way about 2 other people in my life. We talked a lot about that and how my old T would refuse to talk about those feelings.
Well new T said he didn't realize how deep those feelings really were, they weren't the typical client sexual transference feelings. These were based on enternal "spirit" feelings that were present from the beginning. New T finally understood me on this. He said we needed to deal with this because this is on the surface right now. We did more processing and then did a gentle one at the end with a positive afframation at the end. I feel better now. I surprised myself on how just thinking of my old T after a long time of not thinking of him, that I miss him, and I finally realized it and it made me cry. I feel so sad about that.
I am pretty sure he is avoiding me at the gym now. I haven't seen him there for over a month. I feel sad that he isn't going because of me. I guess he is doing the right thing for us. But it is hard not to see him, when I quit with him, I didn't realize I would NEVER see him again. I always thought there would be the gym.
My new T told me because of the feelings I had for my old T, it prevented me from getting in deep with my old T and he said maybe I wasn't ready too either. Maybe he is right about that.
I told him that my T will always have have a piece of him inside of me. I need to go and cry, gotta go now.
Posted by B2chica on September 24, 2007, at 13:03:48
In reply to Therapy, posted by Happyflower3 on September 24, 2007, at 11:39:36
Posted by annierose on September 24, 2007, at 16:56:23
In reply to Therapy, posted by Happyflower3 on September 24, 2007, at 11:39:36
>> I feel sad that he isn't going because of me. I guess he is doing the right thing for us. <<<Maybe he is not going to the gym for "him". There could be 1,000 reasons.
There existed a therapist/client relationship. I guess I would not refer to me and my t as an "us" ... "We" talk, "We" work towards my goals. The "us" implies, to me, a couple. A relationship that exists on its own - outside the therapy room. Maybe not, but it does to me.
Posted by Happyflower3 on September 25, 2007, at 16:12:42
In reply to Re: Therapy » Happyflower3, posted by annierose on September 24, 2007, at 16:56:23
I know that you understand your relationship with your T, but mine like everyone else's is different. I did have an outside relationship with him outside of the office, although not a major relationship.
I didn't use the word we, because it would be poor english. Plus our relationships with our T's do go both ways. It doesn't exhist in a vacume.
There is counter transference and transference too.I know he is avoiding me at the gym, sure there is an outside chance I am not the reason. But if someone has been going to this gym for over 5 years very regularly, and all of sudden stops, especially when our relationship had trouble, it is very likely he is not going because of me. In I am sure there is an connection between the two. In my last session with him, I told him my new T said I needed to distance myself from him.
I really don't feel like defending my relationship with him or my choice of words that I use when I post. I just posted because I am going through a very hard time, and need support. I almost regret even posting about this, it seem like how I am feeling totally got lost. I am in pain and I need some support. I would like to have some compassion. I miss my T so much.
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Psychology | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.