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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 3 of 3. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by All Done on April 26, 2007, at 13:04:27
I think I tell my T pretty much everything. It's been hard, but I've tried not to withhold what I'm thinking about and I've tried even harder to tackle the topics which are inherently difficult. The thing is, I feel like I'm stuck or something. Actually, stuck isn't quite the right word, but I feel like there's something I really want to, need to, or should be talking about. I just don't know what it is. Does that make any sense?
I've had a few sessions recently that I like to call "book club sessions". Literally, in one of them, we discussed what books we're reading or have read. Or sometimes it's like it was yesterday, and I just talked a lot about work. There's stuff going on, but I really don't know that it was worthy of an entire session. Toward the end, he was making some comments about what I had told him and I actually made him stop. I couldn't stand that we were spending anymore time on it or, as I told him, I didn't want him to even think about it on my behalf.
Don't get me wrong. I definitely think there are benefits in having the occasional book club session. We've sensed a bit of a shift in the dynamic of our relationship and that's always worth exploring. But...I spent the better part of the session feeling like there was something else I wanted to talk about or maybe was avoiding talking about. I just don't know what it is, though.
I've probably posted this before. I've felt like it plenty of times over the almost four years I've been in therapy. Do any of you ever feel this way? Any suggestions for figuring out what "it" is?
Laurie
Posted by annierose on April 26, 2007, at 16:39:45
In reply to It's there, but what is it?, posted by All Done on April 26, 2007, at 13:04:27
Yes, I know that feeling but don't know what "it" is either. My t will often call these "sessions of interferences". These are the times she really encourages me to do stream of consciousness talking (is that a correct sentence?). I struggle with this concept but I feel I am getting better at it. First, I lie down, shut my eyes and just say WHATEVER - and it takes me from place to place - and it can be revealing (or not). Often I am amazed at what came out or what interpretations she can make of it.
It's frustrating --- that stuck feeling. We don't want to spend $100+ on a 45 minute book club session --- but keep on keeping on and sooner or later you will get to where you need to be.
Good Luck.
Posted by Fallsfall on April 26, 2007, at 20:36:14
In reply to It's there, but what is it?, posted by All Done on April 26, 2007, at 13:04:27
It makes perfect sense to me.
I think Annierose is right that you need to say anything and everything (and nothing) that comes to mind. It is OK if what you talk about doesn't flow, doesn't go together, doesn't make sense. As your therapist hears the different things that are passing through your mind, a pattern might emerge. Or sometimes I find that as I talk about seemingly unrelated things that I happen upon something that does seem important, and then we can talk about that in more depth. Try to feel open and accepting of all of your thoughts. It does sound like there is something that you need to talk about. So let it find it's way to the surface. Don't try to fill the "hour" with entertaining talk. Often in these circumstances it is important for there to be lots of silence so the important topic can percolate up. It may take a couple of sessions to find the topic. Or you may spend the next session doing all of these things and coming up empty - but when you get into your car you will know that you should have spent the session talking about...
I think the key for me is to NOT require myself to make sense. Full sentances are not a requirement, and complete paragraphs are not something you should strive for. As you say something, if you start thinking about something else, then stop what you are saying and start talking about the something else.
It doesn't matter if anyone could follow what you are saying. Either your therapist will find a common thread, or you will figure out what needs to be said.
Good luck. I'll be it is an important topic.
This is the end of the thread.
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