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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by obSession on March 12, 2004, at 17:53:06
does anybody think that therapy is a "mind tease" in a way and its abt wanting what you cant have and if you got it u wouldnt want it?
Posted by noa on March 12, 2004, at 19:05:02
In reply to wanting what you cant have, posted by obSession on March 12, 2004, at 17:53:06
Wanting what I can't have has been a big theme for me---coming from the way my mom responded to my expression of wants and wishes. It came up for me a lot in therapy in the past---I wouldn't want to discuss wishes toward the therapist with him because I felt lousy/greedy/bad for wanting anything, and because I knew I couldn't have what I wanted from the therapist, it would definitely trigger those bad feelings toward my self. But over time I was able to accept that the wanting isn't bad at all and just because you can't get something doesn't mean it is bad to have wanted it.
Funny you should use the word "tease". My therapist has used it to validate some of my perceptions in the past when I felt that certain mini-disclosures about him stimulated all the needy/wanty parts of me. He acknowledged his role in slightly loosening a boundary and he said he understood my feelings because what he had said might have been like a 'tease'.
Posted by obSession on March 13, 2004, at 17:26:21
In reply to Re: wanting what you cant have » obSession, posted by noa on March 12, 2004, at 19:05:02
kewl...i think that to some extent not getting enough as kids can be it extra difficult because u need sooo much more from that one or 2 special people in u life and when that 1 person is u therapist it is really difficult. especially having to realise u will never completely get everything u want at alll, its somewhat frustrating and is also frustrating trying to figure out what u really need and want ...its all so confusing.....
soemtimes does feel like a tease a really bad mind tease.........therapy sometimes can be a whole bunch of "mental orgasms" over and over again yet u can't get enough of it and when u want it, it isnt always accesable.......
its soo hard! most people in the world cant seem to grasp the conecpt to well , but i do think there are lots of tease in psychotherapy and especially in terms of the thereputic relationship. its difficult! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
Posted by terrics on March 14, 2004, at 10:27:35
In reply to wanting what you cant have, posted by obSession on March 12, 2004, at 17:53:06
Yep, sometimes I do. I also think it can be a big money making deal. My T gets big bucks from my ins. I'll let you know about the money thing cause very soon my ins. won't be paying her. I will. She says I can pay whayever I am comfortable with...Somehow I doubt that. terrics
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