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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Partlycloudy on July 28, 2008, at 7:32:37
I have been depressed. And anxious. I am starting to respond to a change in medication. I have been going to more frequent therapy sessions.
One of the ways that my illness has shown itself this time around (interesting that it's not always the same?) has been a complete disinterest in eating. And also I've been feeling "urpy" - kind of nauseous, upset stomach feeling, which doesn't make me want to eat either. We're working on these issues in therapy - milkshakes, sipping protein drinks seem to bypass the problem.
At this point, I've lost close to all my antidepressant-related weight gain. Interesting that while I'm not feeling that wonderful, I'm looking "better" - according to socially accepted norms, that is, than I have in about 5 years.
Also interesting is that the disinterest in eating and general nausea mirrors how I felt through much of my childhood. This is how anxiety expressed itself in me, from the time I was 5 or so, until I was 16, when I discovered drinking. Ii spent most of my growing up years being underweight, according to my doctors. Very finicky about what I would eat. There are lots of triggers going down in my life right now that would be bringing me back to my childhood memories, and this is an extremely uncomfortable time for me. We're talking abandonment issues here.
Anyways. Interesting that my clothes are looking better on me when I care the least about them.
Posted by karen_kay on July 28, 2008, at 19:51:48
In reply to Unexpected consequence of depression, posted by Partlycloudy on July 28, 2008, at 7:32:37
i wish i knew what to say hun. stay strong. cry a whoel lot. keep up on your therapy and sips of shakes.
you'll get through this darling. and we're here with you. please don't forget that, ok?
i'm here if you need me. bmail/email is open and i'm feelign better, so i'm better at respondig now.
((((((pc)))))) take care of you hun. i'm serious. you're a very important person.
Posted by Partlycloudy on July 29, 2008, at 8:09:09
In reply to ((((((((pc)))))))))))), posted by karen_kay on July 28, 2008, at 19:51:48
I'm glad you're feeling better, KK. This place gets kind of empty looking when you're not around.
I'm an important person? Hardly. But thanks for saying so.
Posted by AbbieNormal on July 29, 2008, at 17:16:58
In reply to Re: ((((((((pc)))))))))))) » karen_kay, posted by Partlycloudy on July 29, 2008, at 8:09:09
Yer both really important to Babble. The place is moth-eaten without you.
Abbie
Posted by Racer on July 29, 2008, at 20:24:09
In reply to Re: ((((((((pc)))))))))))) » karen_kay, posted by Partlycloudy on July 29, 2008, at 8:09:09
>
> I'm an important person? Hardly.Just to clarify something: you're important to me.
(And I'm sorry I haven't been better about being in touch -- that's universal right now, I'm not keeping up with anyone, and I'm sorry that it's come at a hard time for you.)
Posted by gardenergirl on July 29, 2008, at 21:19:57
In reply to Unexpected consequence of depression, posted by Partlycloudy on July 28, 2008, at 7:32:37
(((((((((((((((PC)))))))))))))))
Thinking of you. I look back at some photos from about 15 or more years ago and wonder why I was so darned skinny and didn't realize it. It was depression then. It's different now, but then I have more money to buy junk to eat than I did then.
But it sucks. I'm sorry.
Longing for coffee with a dear friend...
gg
Posted by Partlycloudy on July 30, 2008, at 8:04:53
In reply to Just to clarify something » Partlycloudy, posted by Racer on July 29, 2008, at 20:24:09
I find that isolating does happen at the worst of times for me - when I should do it least. I was able to actually reach out on Sunday when I felt trapped and get to a friend's house here for a few hours. It was nothing dire, yet it was an important step for me to have taken; to pick up the phone and have the person say, "do you want to come over?" and zip! I was there in 10 minutes! Funny, actually, except that I was so miserable at the time.
The next few hours passed and I was ready to go home much calmer. And now I know that I'm NOT trapped, that I can get in my car (any time) and drive away for a little while, rather than feel trapped in an uncomfortable domestic situation not of my making. It was a leap of faith for me, someone who, up until that point, had stayed and suffered, withering and roiling inside, letting the poison seep into my muscles. Not pleasant.
And not something I ever, ever have to repeat.
Posted by fayeroe on July 30, 2008, at 9:13:38
In reply to Unexpected consequence of depression, posted by Partlycloudy on July 28, 2008, at 7:32:37
PartlyCloudy, I haven't checked in here in a few days and I just read your post.
I am sorry that you're having such a hard time right now. I understand. If there is anything that I can do for/with you, I will.
Love, Pat
Posted by Sigismund on August 2, 2008, at 20:43:25
In reply to Re: Unexpected consequence of depression » Partlycloudy, posted by fayeroe on July 30, 2008, at 9:13:38
Most of the problems people have are problems they have with each other.
If we could just be in a position to have the right kind of contact, things would be so much better.
But sometimes it is the contact you need that is the contact you cannot have.
Or that the need makes impossible the contact to satisfy the need.I remember from years ago a street demo, and we sat down on the road and linked arms, waiting for the police to cart us off.
I found the expression of that brotherly need quite intoxicating, perhaps because I had spent a decade growing up in a social desert where no one (not members of the same sex, certainly) ever touched each other.Thst is one part of our world that is much better than it used to be.
Posted by fayeroe on August 2, 2008, at 21:29:22
In reply to General Spiel, posted by Sigismund on August 2, 2008, at 20:43:25
> Most of the problems people have are problems they have with each other.
> If we could just be in a position to have the right kind of contact, things would be so much better.My sister and I spoke today and we agreed that living alone is really hard on a person. One thing that happens is we think too much and don't have the contact that comes from talking about things with someone.
> But sometimes it is the contact you need that is the contact you cannot have.That is certainly the truth and a very wise observation, Sigismund.
> Or that the need makes impossible the contact to satisfy the need.Right. So right.
>
> I remember from years ago a street demo, and we sat down on the road and linked arms, waiting for the police to cart us off.
> I found the expression of that brotherly need quite intoxicating, perhaps because I had spent a decade growing up in a social desert where no one (not members of the same sex, certainly) ever touched each other.I grew up in a family that didn't touch.
Do you remember reading about the "arms across America" that took place in the early 80s (i think)? My daughter and I drove to a town in Texas and joined in and as I stood there holding hands with a man and a woman who were strangers, I started crying. It was a wonderful moment when I realized that I was part of a bigger part of the world than I thought I was at that time in my life.
>
> Thst is one part of our world that is much better than it used to be.
This is the end of the thread.
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