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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 3 of 3. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by francesco on February 13, 2004, at 18:25:10
This can be weird or it can be just me. There's a girl I like that can make my life hell or heaven. If I feel she wants me I'm fine, if I think she doesn't want me I'm very depressed.
We have a relationship that lasted for the last one year and an half, but it's a very unstable relationship, first of all because 'I' am unstable, second because we are a kind of 'just friends', so sometimes I can't see her for weeks.
I don't want to tell my story life but I think my depression's episodes have coincided with the times she confessed me she had been with another man while I was hypo when she was mine and no one else's. Why am I saying all this here ?
My psychiatrist says I'm bipolar II or something like. But I know what causes me the 'crisis'. He never asked me 'why' I was depressed and he never asked me 'why' I was hypo. This isn't supposed to be important.
Possibile conclusions:
1. I have a borderline personality disorder
2. biopsychiatry is a bulls**tI mean, people are usually depressed for 'real' reasons, because there are things that they would like and they don't manage to get. I don't want to say that there isn't a something like endogenous depression but, how many of us are affected by it ? If we take meds but the things that make us depressed, whatever they are, don't change will we not continue to be depressed ?
Posted by shadows721 on February 13, 2004, at 20:53:27
In reply to psycological factors in depression, posted by francesco on February 13, 2004, at 18:25:10
I thought of some questions to consider:
1) Would you feel happier without the person in your life?
2) Do you take your meds correctly when you and this person have problems?
3) Are you feeling up and down only around this person?
Sometimes, we project that our depression is due to someone or something. The only way to find out is to be rid of that someone or something. It lets you see if the depression is related to that or it is internal. Personally, I use to project that my depression was due to my job or a boss. When I took a leave of absence from my job, my depression actually worsened. The boss and the job was only a distraction from dealing with my real depression.
Sometimes, we actually choose to make poor decisions when we are depressed. Having someone who is not there for you is not a really good choice. Perhaps, due to your depression, you actually feel you deserve someone who cannot be there for you. Depression causes isolation.
It sounds to me that you would like to go into denial about how much your depression is affecting your life and relationships. Were you bipolar before this relationship? If this relationship is so up and down, what is it due to you are the other person? Is that person reacting to you or the other way around?
Also, you may want to look into books about co-dependency. Your feelings should not revolve around another person. They should revolve in the things that can meet your needs. This person really doesn't sound like she is really there for you. You deserve better than that, but you have to believe you do.
Posted by Sebastian on February 13, 2004, at 22:14:31
In reply to psycological factors in depression, posted by francesco on February 13, 2004, at 18:25:10
#2
so how do you change the bad and make good.
Can't talk to my psyciatrist about real problems and get any advice. Even though I am supposed to be getting that type of stuff. Maybe 1 hour a month is not enough time? So how do you work out the problems, without just taking a pill which makes you feel happyness no matter what. Even then you know life sucks, even though you are feeling happy.
Did you know that dopamine is the direct result of love. Makes you wonder why you don't need it when you take pills that boost dopamine.
This is the end of the thread.
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